Before judging them let us think of the very fact how much
we offend. Many times we make mistakes and we do commit crimes,which influence and affect the whole life of the
children. Many people escape from the responsibility,but it
is true,that many people do not get any more chance to start again. Some people
make bad decisions as a result of perpetual stress
and permanent fear. I experienced on me myself,if I
have fear I am unable to make carefully thought out decisions.
Even the sister of their mother
lived also here,who had brought up 2 young
children,many times working 12 hours a day very hard.. At that time people from
Transylvania had earned 1/3
of the money of the Hungarian people usually got. I do not want
to write down how many times and how they were humbled. Though most of them are
dilligent,honest and god-fearing people, but they
are usually utilized.. Those who treat them like that,made a
big mistake,as God will not forgive it either- Well,this lady has really done a
slave-work. She was working at a boarding-house in the country-side absolving
the work of 3 persons day by day
I liked and honoured this aunt very
much. We often took Andráska to her and we kept contact until she had reported
me telling that I do not bring up Andráska well and correctly. A sod man got
induced her and a mother from another family to report me telling that I am not
bringiong up the children well. He offered her 1 million HUF for it,which they would have never got. If their plan would
have been successful,the children would have been
taken abroad in order to make experiments on them. I had a horrible fear. I was
terrified day and night,that the
children will be taken away from me. I did not understand why it
happens to us? This man had convinced the mother of Andráska to take action
against the Roumanian state. She had returned back home and disappeared.
Andráska had to go to an institution. This evil man had convinced the mother of
Andráska to sell their home. Half of the money was for the aunt, but both the
money and the mother had disappeared. As a result of aboves Andráska,his sisters and brothers, the aunt and her children
remained without any home. Inspite of that he could cheat them the2nd
time again I am sure that he
could find an explanation for everything. This man lives until now from similar
wickedenesses. He is extorting people and therefore they forgive him things for
which he should be inprisoned.. From that
time on the brothers and sisters of Andráska did not allow us to go
there any more.. I did not know what to do,as I knew that they are cheated and I really very much
wanted to keep the relationship, but I had to honour their wish. I knew that
God wants to teach us that we should never have any fear from anybody,but in any case it was horrible.
I am fighting a lot for my contacts
I usually tolerate evil things in order not to get in hell! It was painful for
me what they did,but I was ready to forgive them
and after my own heart I would have gone to them with the children in the
future, too, but I could not. When God had judged this man I had prayed for him
for quite a long time. And the Lord let him to survive it.I saw in his eyse
that he had so many pains,who is he
actually? The devil did not take care of him. I am not angry with him either I
was so shocked when I realized how easier I can forgive people.
Nowadays I do not care about the
very fact what. people are thinking of me or what they are telling about me. Of
course it still hurts me,but I had learnt to
handle it. At that time I thought I get mad,it was
so bad and painful for me. The most worst for me was when I was accused that it was my fault. They thought
that I also had any contact with him,as the
mother of Andráska,who had and they thought that it was me who gave information
to him about the children,though I had met him once only This man does not know
me,but I know quite a lot about him. But now I do not care about it as I know
that the quarrel of a person cannot spoil or hinder the work of
God and that my pain cannot be so much that I should not
pray not even for the most evil people of the world as well.By the way at that time started in me the love without
any condition to be based. Thanks to this situation that God entrusted me with
more and more difficult cases.
Andráska was half a year older than Bátorka,he was a good
developing,wonderful boy. As he was living with his mother at the country-side
he enjoyed to be at the fresh air,he liked to
walk, to ride the bicyclde. He never said anything wrong to me, he had never
answered back and he had never used any bad language. There was only one
problem which rendered our contact very much,namely that
many times he did not do what I asked him. If I asked why he let out something.
In his head he lived in a dream world.. We
were around him,but we only were there. For 5
years every day I went to bed with fear and anguish. Anything I told or asked
him to do he said O.K. but he never did
it He had never raved,cried,he
had suffocated his fury and his bitterness. He destroyed himself
towards the inside,he swallowed his temper,his
hate.the pains of his soul.. He had punished me every day instead of his
mother. It came over me slowly that he is like me in my childhood. He did not
trust anybody! He could not handle his quarrel and fury.
He and we had suffered in
silence.and slowly.I had to win. his confidence and trust. This fight agitated
between us for 5 years. It was probably in the 5th year when he
seemed to believe that I love
him and that he is important for me. This fight had completely used me up. My
health got ruined. The pain of my soul had made my body ill. But if he had not been ,my character has not
been formed so firm and steady. Thanks to Andráska I had learnt to love without
any condition. I will be thankful to him for it forever.
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