Monday, September 1, 2014

Being Broken Part 11 Andrew

He was born in 1989,he died in October 2004
Andráska is one of my most sorrowful memories. He was a wonderful warm-hearted,but very much injured young boy. In 1990 his mother with 3 young children escaped through the Roumanian border from misery and suffer. After the refugee camp they drew back in a small town in the country-side, in the real sense of the word. The illness of the young boy came clear here. Because of the illness of the young boy, their life was characterized by the fear and anguish. People were anxious about their children from them. For quite a long time they could not go to playgrounds and no community had received them into. 
They had lived the life of the outcasted. I know from the brother and sister of Andráska that his father had always drank and that the parents regularly quarrelled with each other. Sorry to say,that these bad experiences had left a mark of anxiety on his soul and spirit. As a small child he had experienced all pains of a miserable life. Not only the state of being ignored,but he had to wear out the illness and the symptoms of the medicines as well. Diarrhoea,slight fever,muscle pain/pains in the muscle/ and becoming easily tired. Though he was one year old when they came and the elder sisters and brothers spoke a lot to him about their father. I could not speak too much about his family either with him or with the other sisters and brothers. If I asked  I was always told, better not to speak about it.They were angry with their mother as she had cheated them and left them here.
Before judging them  let us think of the very fact how much we offend. Many times we make mistakes and we do commit  crimes,which influence and affect the whole life of the children. Many people escape from the responsibility,but it is true,that many people do not get any more chance to start again. Some people make bad decisions as a result of  perpetual stress and permanent fear. I experienced on me myself,if I have fear  I am unable to make carefully thought out decisions.
Even the sister of their mother lived also here,who had brought up 2 young children,many times working 12 hours a day very hard.. At that time people from Transylvania had earned 1/3
of the money of the Hungarian  people usually got. I do not want to write down how many times and how they were humbled. Though most of them are dilligent,honest and god-fearing people, but they are usually utilized.. Those who treat them like that,made a big mistake,as God will not forgive it either- Well,this lady has really done a slave-work. She was working at a boarding-house in the country-side absolving the work of 3 persons day by day
I liked and honoured this aunt very much. We often took Andráska to her and we kept contact until she had reported me telling that I do not bring up Andráska well and correctly. A sod man got induced her and a mother from another family to report me telling that I am not bringiong up the children well. He offered her 1 million HUF for it,which they would have never got. If their plan would have been successful,the children would have been taken abroad in order to make experiments on them. I had a horrible fear. I was terrified day and night,that the children  will be taken away from me. I did not understand why it happens to us? This man had convinced the mother of Andráska to take action against the Roumanian state. She had returned back home and disappeared. Andráska had to go to an institution. This evil man had convinced the mother of Andráska to sell their home. Half of the money was for the aunt, but both the money and the mother had disappeared. As a result of aboves Andráska,his sisters and brothers, the aunt and her children remained without any home. Inspite of that he could cheat them the2nd time again  I am sure that he could find an explanation for everything. This man lives until now from similar wickedenesses. He is extorting people and therefore they forgive him things for which he should be inprisoned.. From that time  on the brothers and sisters of Andráska did not allow us to go there any more.. I did not know what to do,as I knew that they are cheated and I really very much wanted to keep the relationship, but I had to honour their wish. I knew that God wants to teach us that we should never have any fear from anybody,but in any case it was horrible.
I am fighting a lot for my contacts I usually tolerate evil things in order not to get in hell! It was painful for me what they did,but I was ready to forgive them and after my own heart I would have gone to them with the children in the future, too, but I could not. When God had judged this man I had prayed for him for quite a long time. And the Lord let him to survive it.I saw in his eyse that he had so many pains,who is he actually? The devil did not take care of him. I am not angry with him either I was so shocked when I realized how easier I can forgive people.
Nowadays I do not care about the very fact what. people are thinking of me or what they are telling about me. Of course it still hurts me,but I had learnt to handle it. At that time I thought I get mad,it was so bad and painful for me. The most worst for me was when I was accused  that it was my fault. They thought that I also had any contact with him,as the mother of Andráska,who had and they thought that it was me who gave information to him about the children,though I had met him once only This man does not know me,but I know quite a lot about him. But now I do not care about it as I know that the quarrel of a person cannot spoil or hinder the work of God  and that my pain cannot be so much that I should not pray  not even for the most evil people of the world as well.By the way at that time started in me the love without any condition to be based. Thanks to this situation that God entrusted me with more and more difficult cases.
Andráska was half a year older than Bátorka,he was a good developing,wonderful boy. As he was living with his mother at the country-side he enjoyed to be at the fresh air,he liked  to walk, to ride the bicyclde. He never said anything wrong to me, he had never answered back and he had never used any bad language. There was only one problem which rendered our contact very much,namely that many times he did not do what I asked him. If I asked why he let out something. In his head he lived in a dream  world.. We were around him,but we only were there. For 5 years every day I went to bed with fear and anguish. Anything I told or asked him to do he said O.K. but he never did it He had never raved,cried,he had  suffocated his fury and his bitterness. He destroyed himself towards the inside,he swallowed his temper,his hate.the pains of his soul.. He had punished me every day instead of his mother. It came over me slowly that he is like me in my childhood. He did not trust anybody! He could not handle his quarrel and fury. He  and we  had suffered  in silence.and slowly.I had to win. his confidence and trust. This fight agitated between us for 5 years. It was probably in the 5th year when he seemed  to believe that  I love him and that he is important for me. This fight had completely used me up. My health got ruined. The pain of my soul had made my body ill. But if  he had not been ,my character has not been formed so firm and steady. Thanks to Andráska I had learnt to love without any condition. I will be thankful to him for it forever.

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